Tag Archives: Relationships

Not Loving The Way You Lie

image via this website

The first time I heard Love The Way You Lie, I turned it off. It went like that for the 2nd, 3rd and probably 4th time. At first, the song was just annoying. I don’t listen to the radio unless I am in my car and I don’t use my car much.  Anytime I drove somewhere, this song was on . Fine. I’ll listen. And I did listen. I was confused. I felt weird. I didn’t know what or if they were trying to tell me something. 

Here’s what I like about it: The song gives insight into violent and abusive relationships. Awareness. It brings awareness. Kind of. There should be more. At the end of the video there should be a number for a domestic violence hotline. Or a disclaimer: domestic violence is bad! Something. Just something.

I expect this type of song from Eminem, but not from Rihanna. This isn’t because of double standards, but because he has built his career rapping about abuse, murder or harming someone (this still does not make it okay, it’s just a fact).  I know, I know, they were both in abusive relationships. They both have domestic violence street cred. Nonetheless, I expect more from Rihanna because of statements she’s made about her situation with Chris Brown. Quoting her interview with Diane Sawyer:

“When I realized that my selfish decision for love could result into some young girl getting killed, I could not be easy with that part. I couldn’t be responsible … If Chris never hit me again, who’s to say that their boyfriend won’t … kill these girls? These are young girls. I just didn’t realize how much of an impact I had on these girls until that happened. It was a wake-up call for me, big time, especially when I took myself out of the situation,” Rihanna says emotionally. A  synopsis of the interview is here.

I understand she’s in the music business to make money, BUT, given her statements on her specific situation, and the concern she expressed for her female fans, I thought there could have been a positive spin somewhere. I’m not implying that she is forever obligated to be the poster child for anti-domestic violence. However, with the rawness of this song/video, I think there was a missed opportunity. A public service announcement at the end of the video: “Call this number if you or someone you know needs help” would have sufficed for me.

What do you think?